Reading Between the Lines

Recently at a dinner party, I engaged in some exploratory conversation with friends-of-friends who I had just met. One of them had asked about my entrepreneurial pursuits in my bodywork practice. As I shared, I divulged a theory that I've curiously thought about for years about our fascial system and how it functions in similar ways to other systems we see in nature.

In a world of comparisons, my 'intellectual side' paled in comparison to this gentlemen's clear, laser sharp mind and acumen. Even so, I genuinely shared my perspective that was devoid of any 'scientific proof' and exclusively born through intuition.

It's interesting to note that as I was sharing, I found it difficult to access my 'inner knowing' in a clear manner. It's as if there was an interruption to my thought process that made it difficult to articulate my thoughts. This accentuated a feeling of insecurity around my sharing as it was clear that this person highly valued science and appeared to be skeptical of my perspective.

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." ~Albert Einstein

I've felt this way before while talking with certain people and for a long time, I could not figure out what was going on. Why is it that sometimes words would roll off my tongue with so much ease and clarity that it even surprised me, as if I was being 'helped' in accessing my highest expression? And other times, I would stutter as if I had zero capacity to even speak a constructive sentence!

Initially, my awareness around this emerged years ago when I would notice that in the presence of a certain friend of mine, I could not articulate my thoughts as easily as I could with other people. When I realized that it was not just a random occurrence, but happened every time I was with this particular person, I began to wonder, "why?"

I didn't pursue this inquiry on purpose. Like many things, the answer came to me. It was first articulated both in visual and in dialogue through the movie 'The Celestine Prophecy' {in a scene where the hero was being manipulated by the 'bad guy'. The man was convincingly trying to steer the hero toward a particular pursuit during a conversation. The hero did not know at this point that he was a bad guy, but in sharing this conversation with his mentor, he described how "all the sudden I just couldn't think." His mentor understood immediately and began to describe to him what it feels like to be manipulated.}

While in the scenario with my friend years ago, I don't relate to being manipulated per se, there is a similarity that unlocked the 'a-ha' that I was looking for to understand what I was feeling and experiencing. 

In times of struggling to communicate cohesive thoughts with certain people that in other times are effortless, I believe that my intuition is picking up on an interruption that throws off my train-of-thought. The interruption comes from thought form waves that are present under the surface of the 'other' whom I'm interacting with. These thought form waves are of domination (people who tend to dominate the conversation),  abandonment (people who are not present to listen) and judgement + projection (people who inwardly cast judgement and project ridicule). I then receive this message and am further blocked by my own self-conscious tendencies in being judged, not smart enough, or not having something important enough to say to be heard. If I am doing my inner work, I will not be easily pulled down the rabbit hole of this derailing belief structure and make it about me. I will have the capacity to be a stand for myself and to just notice the exchange without taking it personally. 

In hindsight, what I realized what I was feeling with my friend was domination. She had a tendency to almost completely dominate any given conversation. When it would come time for me to try and share, I had a hard time getting the words out and when I did, she inevitably would end up interrupting me and taking control of the conversation once again. What I believe is that this dynamic disrupted my flow of consciousness because I was not receiving the reciprocal flow of energy from who I chose to 'connect' with. 

"Givers advance the world. Takers advance themselves and hold the world back."  ~Simon Sinek

As for the dinner party, what I felt was judgement + projection. And while I could never be 'sure' that this was actually going on, I picked up on this superiority complex more than once in the course of the evening. It's seemingly so subtle that it could be (and often is) interpreted as harmless conversation, especially when it involves people who do not know each other. 

While I am a proponent for everyone having the right to their perspective and opinion as well as seeing my part and my lesson, the main piece that is at the forefront of my mind around this topic is that we are evolving toward our more energetic nature and how we USE our energy is EVERYTHING!!!

I 100% believe that we are evolving toward a more intuitive, even telepathic nature and that as much as people think that they can hide what's actually going on inside {usually by practiced behaviors of charisma, manipulation, passive/aggressiveness and slight of hand}, people are waking up to these discrepancies and calling bullshit! 

We are learning to read between the lines and many of us can feel the dissonance of things unspoken as clearly as we feel hot + cold. It's like this....   watch this.

As we gain greater access to these higher faculties, it will become increasingly more difficult to perpetuate this type of fractured relating. In allowing ourselves to be guided by intuition and becoming aware of how we feel in situations, we can make more informed decisions for our welfare, even if the only evidence we have is a 'feeling'.

We all have to take accountability for what lies beneath the surface of our own skin, thoughts and feelings. Whether that is on the dominating/judgement side of the spectrum, the insecure/self-conscious side, or anywhere in between. When we graduate beyond these power struggle and undermining tendencies, the possibility of relating authentically becomes available and we can step into another level of our evolution through human relating.

Watch this > The Celestine Prophecy, giving and receiving energy clip

 

 

 

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